Through the pain and the wrestling of trying to break free from the stuff that's held us back or no longer serves us, comes this reminder that the commandments of God are not burdensome (1 John 5:3) and that His yoke is easy and burden is light (Matthew 11:30). So when we feel shackled by something heavy we can't seem to shake or move out of, perhaps our struggle is we are not fully leaning into the better place God desires to take us to. Because the past is what we know (even if it was unhealthy or painful), that is what we'll keep circling back to. Even when we know it's not longer useful to us, the temptation will be to second guess the choice to move on, or to waste our time in the what-ifs, or to question if we heard right that it was time to let that thing or person or experience go. And thus, we'll take it back again. Think some more over whether or not we're ready to turn loose.
Because, at the end of the day, we're afraid of what is ahead. Since we don't know what God's best will turn out to be, we would rather trade the possibility of wholeness for the certainty of fear and dysfunction. And even though we hear the call into something better and we say we trust the Guide, we still find it hard to close our past chapters in peace. To bury the shame, the guilt, the fear, the doubts, the trauma and exchange it for the abundant life Jesus promised. "I have come to give you life to the full," Jesus said (John 10:10). Yet most of us are settling for the predictability of a life of halves when a whole world of freedom and healing is available to us.
Thing is, until we reach a place where we believe that what is ahead will turn out to be better than what we've left behind, we won't completely let go. If we're still convinced there's a chance the story could be different or we're still debating on whether turning loose will end up being a worthwhile risk, we will never release. We may get up our courage and try to turn loose, but we'll end up taking it back and not fully mourning it and saying goodbye because we haven't fully settled in our mind that opening our hands and hearts to something else is a solid trade. Our brains would rather revert to what they know then embrace the idea of something new that feels uncertain. Only in the context of safety and faith can we begin to step toward a new beginning and embrace it for all its worth.
I don't know what you feel like you're being held back by. I don't know what it is that you've wrestled to let go of. But what it do know is that you must give yourself loads of grace because this process likely will take a bit. Some people may be able to release something quickly but, for most of us, it will probably be awhile. And that's okay. Whatever you need to do in order to feel like you've fully said goodbye... that is essential to your healing journey... so go ahead and take the time. Have the funeral for that memory. Thank that thing for serving you for a season. Forgive as you've been forgiven. Burn that ship if you must. But then turn your face toward the next thing coming and accept that God has a good plan for you up ahead. Some of the very best things that came to me in life arrived on the heals of a major letting go on my part that took place - almost like God made it clear to me I couldn't receive what He wanted to give me until I let something go that made room for it.
As you stare down this pathway of where letting go might take you, know that there is more ahead for you than you could ever dream. But you can't seize it unless you are willing to open your palms and let God take from you whatever isn't meant for you or what is keeping you from the life you could have. Until your Isaac is put on the altar, full healing will never be possible (Genesis 22:1-19). So today, I give you permission to sit with what is holding you back and grieve it completely. But I also give you permission to dream and believe that God will lead you into something far better than you can ever imagine and that His best is worth whatever sacrifice is asked of you along the way.
What isn't healthy is when we allow ourselves so many options that we lose sight of the contented life. We keep moving the goal posts on what is considered satisfactory and it starts to become easier to miss and even let go of really solid people and things that are already in our life because we're too focused on what's ahead or what could be. The excess of this leads to featured relationships, inability to commit, decision fatigue, burnout, and overall dissatisfaction with our everyday life. The simple stuff used to make our ancestors happy. Now, we think we have to have it all until we can feel like we have enough. And to be honest with you, I'm pulling out of this mentality. I'm done.
Years ago, I realized that the savoring way was calling to me and I actually needed far less in the way of money, commitments, career, etc. in order to be supremely satisfied. I noticed that the more I resisted the pace of society and chose to live the intentional life, the more alive I actually felt. The small things became big sources of joy to me. It was like time slowed down and I could hear my own thoughts. I could hear God's voice. I could fully see the people in my life for who they are and give them my undivided love and attention. Yes, I also realized that most people weren't going to live this way with me and my circle of friends might be small. Yes, I knew that I would probably "miss out" one some opportunities because I refused to hop on the hustle train. But also knew that constantly reaching for the next thing... and the next... and the next would lead to a life of lack that would take away any ability within me to fully appreciate my own precious ride through this life. Especially following a lot of loss in my story, I believed in my decision to go a different way because I saw that the insatiable longing everyone is after is really just an inner ache for something eternal only God can fill.
And so my challenge to you is this: what would happen if you made the decision to accept life as it's given to you as being enough? If the family, church, community, job, etc. that you have is good and solid, what might change in your life if you simple stopped looking for the next thing and just sat with the gifts in front of you right now? Perhaps you'd be surprised at what you see. Maybe you would suddenly realize that you actually have it pretty good and reaching for yet one more thing isn't actually all that necessary. Maybe you would finally be still enough to hear what God has to say and to notice things you've been too busy to see. Just maybe you'd also finally see just how loved and special you are and that the world around you is better simply because you exist in it.
Run an experiment on yourself this week: resist the urge to make another change, another move, add another option and see what happens. What you have just may prove to be enough after all.
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